


If You Let Me

by Saturn9



Series: Clandestine [5]
Category: Persona 5
Genre: (with a dash of bittersweet), M/M, but then we're back to our regularly scheduled fluff, little bit of argument, small angst at the beginning, thank you all for not rioting in the streets omg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-12
Updated: 2018-09-12
Packaged: 2019-07-11 15:42:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15975389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saturn9/pseuds/Saturn9
Summary: A couple months pass, before Akira sees Goro again.





	If You Let Me

**Author's Note:**

> i'm continuing to be blown away by everyone's support, you have all made a poor old writer very dearly happy <3

A month passed, wherein Akira tried to put Goro Akechi behind him.

He resumed training with Ryuji. He played shogi with Hifumi, and video games with Futaba. Ann took him to trendy restaurants, as well as a handful of photoshoots. He helped Sojiro with Leblanc again. He tried to hate Goro Akechi; the boy was an asshole who had thrown him away like trash. He was beginning to piece his life back together, or what he had left of it anyway.

It was another calm day at the cafe. Sojiro was tossing him sneaky looks of approval as he helped wash dishes and brew coffee. Akira’s heart wasn’t in it, but at least it was a start.

“Detective Akechi, what can you tell us about your current case?”

Akira jerked so suddenly that coffee sloshed over the rim of the mug he was holding. It clattered loudly against the saucer, but it was all distant to Akira, whose attention was suddenly on the TV.

He wasn’t prepared to see Detective Akechi, all sparkling eyes and charming smile, like he’d been nothing except completely fucking fine for the last month.

“You can’t give a customer a half-full cup,” Sojiro muttered in criticism. Akira was somewhat aware that the older man was extracting the mug from his grasp, even as he was unable to take his eyes off the image of Goro, the first glance of him he’d seen since that night. Sojiro caught on to his distraction, looking up at the screen. “Didn’t he used to come by here? The two of you seemed to get along.”

 _Yeah,_ Akira thought sourly, _And then I blew him upstairs and he ran as fast as he could._

***

Another month passed. The gang took their midterms, and then Akira started picking up shifts at the flower shop again. It was a good way to busy his hands, even if it reminded him of Goro. Pretty much everything did nowadays, though.

After his shift, the subway was sparse as usual. Akira slipped into an empty car, anticipating a silent ride.

Then at the next stop, something familiar but no less unexpected happened.

Goro Akechi boarded.

He was halfway in the car before he looked up and saw Akira, recognition dawning on his face. Akira had forgotten how attractive he was, how his hair framed his face, the red amber of his eyes, the softness of his lips. It all came back to him like a sucker punch. There was so much he’d thought he wanted to say to Goro, if they ever saw each other again, but in an instant, Akira was rendered completely speechless.

“I should go,” Goro said, even though the car was already warning that the doors would soon be closing. Akira's eyes landed on the sling that cradled the detective’s left arm; concern bubbled in his chest, although he tried to tell himself it wasn't his business. Goro had been avoiding him for a solid two months, which was a pretty clear signal that nothing was Akira’s business.

“You said you’d stay.”

The accusation fell out of Akira’s mouth like a trainwreck. He was hurt, angry, that Akechi could move on like nothing had happened. Caught off-guard, Goro only stared back at Akira in shock as the doors slid shut behind him, effectively trapping them together, at least for a stop. The mask Detective Akechi wore had slid off to expose a wounded, cornered animal.

“You promised, Goro.”

A defensive snarl curled Goro’s lips. “And what if I had stayed? I never leave your room again? I’m stuck as a prisoner for the rest of my life?”

“What are you talking about? Of course I wouldn’t--”

“I warned you, Akira. I told you not to get involved. I told you you didn’t know me.”

“Yeah, but then you _fucked_ me.”

Goro flinched back, dropping his gaze, though he still looked ready to lash out. “That wasn’t part of the plan,” he mumbled.

“So what was the plan, exactly? Pretend to be my friend, spend all your time with me, kiss me every once in a while then--” _Then break my heart,_ Akira thought, but the words stuck in his throat.

“ _You_ weren’t part of the plan.”

“And what part of the plan was getting hit so hard you had to come to Leblanc at two in the morning with a black eye?”

“That was a mistake,” Goro argued, although his voice was beginning to waver. Akira might have been more sympathetic if he hadn’t spent the last two months trying to hate the boy, to get the memory of him out of his head.

“The black eye, or coming to see me?”

“Both,” he said quietly.

“We both know you’re not that stupid, Goro. You knew what you were doing “

“I made a mistake, Akira, I just needed--”

“No, you came to me because you knew I’d fall for it. You knew you could say or do whatever the hell you wanted, and I’d just let it happen, because I was an idiot enough to actually care--”

“I’m not that cold!” Goro snapped suddenly. A heavy silence fell, Akira cut off and surprised, searching Goro’s face for an explanation. “Okay? I wanted to be. You weren’t supposed to-- I wasn’t supposed to like you. I came over because I _liked_ you, Akira. I tried not to, but I fucked up; I got attached.”

“But you left-- no goodbye, no note, no texts--”

“For you. I did it for you. I-- there’s nowhere I can go that he won’t find me. And if-- if I care about you, if I let myself--”

“Goro…”

When it came to Goro, Akira was weak. As upset as he was, he couldn't stop himself from looking at Goro with sad eyes, full of longing. As much as he’d tried to move on, he still felt pulled by an unseen force to somehow make it better-- but not for himself, for Goro. Akira couldn’t help himself.

“I've missed you,” Akira said quietly. A beat passed, but it didn't seem like Goro was willing to respond. “I had a, a whole list of things to say to you if you ever spoke to me again, but-- now that you're here, I just… want to make sure you're okay.”

What Goro said was, “I've lived this long, haven't I?”

What he meant, Akira knew, was, “Not even a little bit.”

“I meant it, you know. Whatever you're going through, it doesn't have to be alone. I could protect you.”

“You don't even know what you're promising.”

“You know what I've done for my friends. I care about you. Why wouldn't I try to help?”

“Because you have no idea what's going on.”

“Then tell me, Goro, for fuck's sake…” Akira sighed, exasperated.

“Why do you even care? I left, Akira, just… let it go.”

“I'm falling for you,” Akira said softly. Goro jerked, his eyes suddenly earnest, searching Akira for any sign of falsehood. “You're brilliant, and surprisingly funny, and soft, and you're so intense it breaks my heart. The way you say my name, how your lips curl when you're being rude, the sparkle in your eyes; how when you blush, it spreads down your neck -- everything you do, Goro, it's so beautiful to me. I know you don’t want to let me in, but if you let me, I'll do whatever it takes to make sure you never have to look over your shoulder again.”

By the time Akira finished his speech, Goro was wide-eyed and trembling, hanging on to every word like it was a lifeline. It was a gamble, but Akira clasped his hand around Goro's wrist and gently tugged him closer.

The next thing he knew, Goro’s good hand was wound in his hair as the detective crushed their lips together. Akira's heart jumped into his throat; his hands fell to Goro's waist and pulled him close, awkwardly cramming Goro’s injured arm between their chests. A soft keening noise escaped the detective, needy but still hesitant. Goro was a mess, Akira couldn't help but think; one he wouldn't mind cleaning up. When Akira nipped at his lip, Goro melted; another quiet, helpless noise echoed in the car as Akira tangled their tongues together.

“How?” Goro whispered into Akira’s mouth, his voice cracking. The question put enough distance between their lips for Goro to clarify. “After I've been nothing but a complete ass to you, how can you still mean all that?”

“Honestly, I tried to get over you. It, uh. Didn't work.”

Goro’s smile at the understatement was slight and broken. As far as Akira could remember, it was the first real smile he’d ever gotten out of the boy.

“I didn’t think it would be hard,” Goro admitted, sounding somewhat ashamed now that Akira’s arms were wrapped around his waist, lips pressed softly to his temple. “I thought things would go back to the way they were. I've never had someone I couldn't bear to ruin before…”

“You're not going to ruin me,” Akira murmured.

“If you let me, I just might.”

Akira thought he might let Goro do just about anything, as long as he stuck around. He closed the distance again, lifting Goro’s chin to capture his lips in another kiss, this one slower, sweeter; the taste of Goro on his lips again felt like coming home. He could hardly bear to pull away when the car jerked to a stop, nearly sending them toppling in their inattention.

“Come with me,” Akira said; his hand slipped from Goro’s waist to grab his hand and give it a reassuring squeeze. When Goro didn’t resist, Akira led the way off the train, pulling Goro with him.

“Just like that? You’re not pissed?” Goro’s voice was hesitant, like he didn’t expect to be given a second chance; in the empty subway station, it sounded even smaller. “You’re not going to… ask where I’ve been, or why I left, or--” He stopped himself short, looking away.

“Oh, don’t get me wrong, I was upset when I woke up and you were gone. But I know why you left.” Akira said, nodding to Goro’s sling. He didn’t need to say the words for the acknowledgment to register on Goro’s face.

“I can’t promise you’re not going to get hurt again,” Goro warned.

“I can’t promise I’m not going to handcuff myself to you.” Akira’s gentle teasing pulled a nervous smile from Goro as they climbed the stairs. “But this time, when you promise to stay, I’m going to hold you to it.”

Goro swallowed thickly. Akira turned to him, to see those deep red amber eyes searching him once again, like he somehow held all the answers.

“Okay,” he said eventually. “I’ll stay this time, if you let me.”

**Author's Note:**

> alright alright alright, i know i made you guys deal w the angst so i owe you all porn now... pls send me ideas/special requests bc um ideas for smut are hard? 
> 
> also please continue to leave me comments because they literally make my whole life, you all are so sweet and wonderful


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